The Unspoken Truth
by Azonuka
Summary: He and Kevin are the only uke in their relationship. Both of them are lovely, great and beautiful. So how come only Kevin is special? He felt left out after his lovers found out the blond boy is pregnant. Yes. Kevin is a bearer. He can get pregnant whereas Ryoma can't. Warning : Mpreg, Angst, OT7, OT6, Broken grammar.
1. Chapter 1

**Not much different in this chapter. i add some angsty scene. Happy reading.**

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**Chapter 1 : Misery**

Ryoma came home late one night to find his six other lovers already sound asleep on their huge king size bed. He smiled sadly at the sight. Slowly and gently he walked to watch them. Rise and fall of their chest showed how tired they are especially Kevin, who are sleeping at the center of the bed. He was hugged side by side by Seiichi and Syuusuke.

His rounded belly is very obvious on the sight. Seeing that, Ryoma's sadness only get worse.

Jealousy.

It was something he couldn't have no matter how much he wants it. A bearer is very rare in this world. Kevin was just lucky to be one of them.

He can give his lovers a child while Ryoma can't.

He can have an experience of birthing a heir while Ryoma will just stand and happy at the newborns that will be born in the future.

Jealous at Kevin that can get pregnant only one of the reason that spark his uneasiness ever since they found out about his pregnancy.

His lovers, their attitude have changed. Not in the bad way. It just that they had become more protective toward Kevin. Not that Ryoma really complain, he understand that Kevin needed most of the attention. But his lovers didn't realized that he is, in fact also needs their attention too.

They still pay attention to him too but not as often as it used to be when Kevin is still not pregnant.

Ryoma continue to stare at his sleeping form of lovers until he get tired and decided to take a bath. He made his way quietly to the big monstrous bathroom that Keigo had specifically designed himself. He needs to cool himself off.

**~the unspoken truth~**

Ryoma sat alone under the tree reading some kind of book that Tezuka gave him three days ago, saying that the book is good and he was sure Ryoma would like it. He gladly accepted it and as soon as he has his holiday from work, he immediately read the book. Very excited to share some kind of new story with Tezuka.

When he is nearing his third chapter of the book, he suddenly hear laughter coming from the garden. He immediately peeked, although he already knew that the laugher was belonged to Kevin. He is so curious to know what has made the blond boy to laugh like that. He haven't heard Kevin laughing his ass off like that ever since his pregnancy started.

He can see that Kevin is lying on the blanket that was set down on the grass. A small kid is sitting near him and currently touching Kevin's belly. Oh, that must be the cause of his laughter. Tickling by a kid. Ryoma zoomed his vision, trying to remember where did he has seen that kid before.

He got his answer when Genichirou suddenly appeared carrying a basket.

Sanada Sasuke, Genichirou's nephew. Now he remembered the kid. He has seen him one time when he was visiting Sanada's household a few months ago. The kid is Genichirou's older brother's son and he hates Ryoma.

Ok, not entirely hate but he has shown some kind of attitude that show he is not comfortable when Ryoma is around. He had cryied his lung out the first time they met, saying how scary Ryoma's eyes are. Well, he can't help it if his eyes are so piercing to a kid like him. That time he didn't leave a good impression on the kid. Maybe he should be nicer this time and greet them.

Ryoma closed the book and made sure to bookmark it so that he could continue reading it later. He stand up and slowly made his way to the trio. Genichirou is not aware of Ryoma coming toward them because he is busy setting down the food on the blanket. Kevin is so focus on the kid to notice that Ryoma is walking to their direction.

"Kevin. Gen." He greeted, which startling the trio.

"Oh hi Ryoma. I wasn't aware of you there." Kevin greeted back and set aside the four year old kid.

Genichirou, however, tense when he saw Ryoma. Ryoma raised his eyebrow, not understand what is the meaning behind of that attitude is. Isn't he supposed to be happy to see his lover?

"Ryo-" Genichirou spoke but immediately stop when Sasuke suddenly bawled.

The three were startled by the sudden burst from the kid. Kevin immediately hug the kid and trying to shush him to stop crying and asking why is he suddenly crying like that.

Ryoma and Genichirou already knew the answer but the two of them decided to keep quiet about it.

"Hey…what is wrong? Why are you suddenly crying like this?" Kevin softly asked. He gently patted the kid head.

"Uncle *hic* is lying." Sasuke spoke in his childish tone.

Kevin raised his eyebrow. He turned his questioning eyes to look at Genichirou. "Why is uncle lying? What did he lied to you?" He continue to ask.

"He-he said that the big bad wolf won't be here."

Ryoma twitched when he hear his nickname given by the kid. Seriously, a big bad wolf. So if he is the wolf then the kid is red riding hood. Let see if he can gnawed both the uncle and the nephew after this.

"Eh? Who is the big bad wolf, Sasuke?" Kevin is confused by now.

Ryoma is already glaring at Genichirou.

Sasuke shakily pointing toward Ryoma and Kevin followed the direction his small finger is pointing. He suddenly have the gut to laugh when he realized the kid's meaning about the wolf. But he stop himself from doing so and continue to sooth the kid.

"Uncle Ryoma is not a big bad wolf. He is nice you know."

"No, he isn't!" Sasuke continue to bawl. "Uncle said I can play safely with you today because the wolf is absent."

Kevin does not know how to react to that. He turned his head to look at Genichirou and Ryoma once again, trying to get their help.

Ryoma, who already had enough, silently hissed in anger. "I'm going away now so that you can play safely with that uncle of yours." He retorted and walk away.

Kevin stunned when he saw how angry Ryoma got. He stared worriedly at Genichirou and the man only whispered 'just let him go'.

Kevin is not happy about this situation but the kid in his lap is still sobbing, so his priority right now is the kid. He just hope that Ryoma is alright.

Ryoma is cursing all the way from the garden to his private study room. He throw the book to the sofa, huffing in annoyance at how Genichirou made him look worse in the eyes of his nephew. Seriously, bad wolf. And he won't be here today. As in won't be in the mansion? He could have swear Genichirou knew he is not working today.

Ryoma take a deep breath and sat down on the sofa. He shouldn't have approached the little happy family and now he is miserable. Because he feel useless and Gen's beloved nephew hated him.

Some life he got.

**~the unspoken truth~**

"Ryoma-"

"Pissed off." Ryoma snarled at Genichirou who suddenly appeared in the dining room at 6 am.

He never wake up this early before. Only Ryoma wake up early because he is always jogging in the morning. This strange attitude only served him a suspicious feeling to Ryoma.

"Can you listen to what I'm saying first?" Genichirou practically pleaded. "I haven't even say anything yet."

"No. I'm not going to listen. I'm too busy to listen to you." He chewed his bacon without even spare Genichirou a stare.

"You are only eating. What is so busy?" Genichirou walked and sit beside Ryoma.

"Can't you see I'm busy eating my breakfast?" Ryoma still refused to look at Genichirou.

"Look. I'm so sorry about what happen with Sasuke last time." Genichirou decided to continue despite Ryoma's lack of interest in starting a conversation with him.

"Ok. I forgive you. Now, piss off!" He said in insincere way. He really is not in the mood to talk now. He needs his quiet morning, alone.

Genichirou was about to open his mouth again when Ryoma glared at him, immediately silencing the man.

A few second later, Genichirou still have the courage to retort back to Ryoma. "Can you at least appreciate my effort to say sorry?"

"Excuse me?"

"If it is not for Kevin, I wouldn't waste my time here, this early in the morning."

"What?" So, he is apologizing to him because he was told so by Kevin, not from his own heart. Great, you ruin my day again. Ryoma huffed in annoyance and stand up.

He ignore Genichirou whose eyes followed his foot step until he exited the dining room.

_Stupid Gen!_

**~the unspoken truth~**

He can't remember the last time he and Keigo spend their time playing tennis together. It was two weeks ago he accompanied Kunimitsu who decided to read at the library. He and Genichirou had just quarrel with each other because of some brat.

Syuusuke had long stop asking him to be his model for his photo taking session. Nowadays, he always ask Kevin. Syuusuke had taken a liking to take a picture of Kevin's rounded belly. Almost everyday, he tooks Kevin picture everywhere. He said he wanted to record all the important moment of Kevin's pregnancy. Seiichi only talk with him one or two words nowadays. He can understand that Seiichi have a problem at his workplace. Sometime he snapped at Ryoma for just asking if he is alright.

But when he faces Kevin, his mood immediately brighten. That hurt Ryoma the most. Slowly and hurtfully, he began to draw from Seiichi. Well, he is not some kind of punching bag for Seiichi to let his anger go.

His work as a model and actor doesn't allow him to come home early. So he always missed the dinner with their parents or watching movie with his lovers.

When Kevin had whined that he wants to go to Italy to eat their ice cream, his five lovers excluding Ryoma immediately take holiday just to accompany their young lover to get what he wants. Ryoma also wants to join but getting a holiday is too hard for him. His schedule was full.

And so he worked hard just to finish his modeling work and finally he get three days holiday. He went home with this smile that he rarely show just to be crushed when he get the news that his lovers already flied themselves to Italy that morning. It's all because Kevin can't wait anymore and demand he get the ice cream that day.

They can't even wait for him. So, Ryoma flied alone to Italy and join his lovers there. Well, his holiday consist mostly following Kevin wherever he wants to go.

They compile with him, just succumbing to his whiny demands. Ryoma started to regret following them to Italy. If he knew, he should just spend his holiday sleeping at mansion rather than going to every restaurant Italy's had.

So, Ryoma had lied for the first time, saying that he got emergency work and need to fly back to Japan when in fact, he spend his time at hotel sleeping.

After that, his time spending with his lovers become less and less. He didn't even get to accompanied Kevin to his second ultrasound to know about the baby's gender.

That night, their parents come to dinner to celebrate with them. Ryoma said he can't join them but Keigo insisted that they wait for Ryoma. Ryoma had to ditch his work that day in favor of not angering the old parents who doesn't have the patience to wait for Ryoma. So when Ryoma make an entrance, Atobe Hanako immediately comment on him. Saying how he don't appreciate Kevin and he value his work rather than his lovers. Well bitch, he needs money to support himself. Ryoma retorted inside of his mind.

Ryoma didn't reply to Keigo's mother sarcasm. Instead he walked past the parents and kissed his lovers one by one before he takes a seat beside Kunimitsu.

That night they announced that Kevin is having a baby girl. They had cheered loudly for the happy occasion. Except for Ryoma who is too tired that he had to force himself to smile and congrate Kevin.

Atobe Hanako who has been eyeing Ryoma ever since he step inside the dinner room has snapped at him.

"Ryoma-kun, if you are not in the mood. Why don't you go excuse yourself?" Hanako suggested with annoying tone.

So many eyes snapped at the tone Hanako suddenly let out just to talk with Ryoma.

Ryoma's forced smile fell at that words. "What do you mean, Hanako-sama?" He refused to acknowledge the meaning behind the question.

"I mean seeing you here, tired and not in the mood to celebrate this news with us, also make me lose mood."

If Ryoma could widen his eyes in anger, he would. That woman dare to blame him. Ryoma stole a glance at Keigo, hoping that he would help him. If he just walk away from this dinner, that mean what Hanako said is true and he refuse to let that woman win. Ryoma is really not in the mood for this crap.

Keigo who has been quite ever since his mother started to talk immediately lessen the tension in the mood.

"Ryo, my mother is just worried about you. If you really tired, you can excuse yourself." He said in the tone that suggested that he is not in the mood for this silent argument.

Ok. WTF?! At least you could do is defend your own lover. Ryoma gripped his fork and wished he could stab son and mother with the fork there and now. He throw away his napkin gently before he excuse himself in the most polite manner he can do before stomping away, anger bubbling inside of his heart.

That argument that night showing how much damage their relationship can get after that.

Because someone already realize the wrong in their relationship with Ryoma. Another realize the jealousy that Ryoma reflected in his eyes. Another person are very protective and worry that the change in Ryoma attitude would lead a danger to Kevin's pregnancy. All of this assumption were made because of Atobe's mother.

"If only Ryoma also can get pregnant like Kevin, would it be like getting two grandchildren at the same time?" Sanada Yumiro had voiced one night, her intention of it was just for a joke but not everyone thought of it as joke. Well not for Ryoma.

He tensed and his expression immediately changed.

Hanako snorted upon hearing that. "I wonder even if he get pregnant, we can't sure that the child that he bears would be our grandchild."

Ryoma snapped angrily at that comment. Atobe's mother just accuse him of cheating. "Excuse me, Hanako-sama. Are you implying that I cheat on my lovers?" He question with this strain of his voice.

The other people in the dinner room already quite themselves. Kevin already showed some kind of distress at the sudden tension. Stress isn't good for him.

Keigo realized this and sighed. "Mother…" He slowly said and turned to his mother. "Please don't talk like that about Ryoma. He is our part of family. Even if he get pregnant, his child would be our child too."

"Kei-"

"No, mom. Listen. We are here to strengthen our bond not to add stress to Kevin. Please realize this. Any other thing you want to talk to Ryoma, do it privately. I don't want you to do it in front of Kevin."

Ok. That doesn't make Ryoma feel good at all. Keigo stop his mother because he doesn't want Kevin to stress. Not to defend him.

Losing his appetite, he excuse himself, aware that Keigo had called his name, but chose to ignore it. He walked fast to their room and locked himself in the bathroom, trying his hard not to cry.

After Ryoma had left, it was Tezuka's father who talk first just to lessen the tension. Nothing much change after that, they talk with each other about everything that doesn't involve Ryoma.

His lovers doesn't even aware of Ryoma's delicate heart start to break after that, because their attention mostly focus on Kevin.

After that one dinner, Ryoma would try to refuse to eat with them whenever he heard the parents are coming. He will not stand another sarcasm from Atobe's mother. If his lovers would be brave enough to defend, he doesn't care but they didn't even spare glance at him when Hanako make that one comment about the children that he would bear wouldn't be theirs.

Shame on you. He hissed in anger. I can't get pregnant so you wouldn't know whether it would be your grandchildren.

Ryoma is not that entirely fool to neglect his lovers, he did try to spend his time with them but all they can talk with him was the upcoming baby. Every single one of his semes would talk about how adorable the baby would be when it's already born.

He is sick of all this. It is all about Kevin. Kevin is lucky. Kevin is special. Kevin is sweet. Can't wait to see the baby.

Ryoma finally snapped when Keigo wouldn't stop praising the blond boy when he and Ryoma is having a dinner alone at this fancy restaurant that Keigo had promised to bring him to about two months ago.

"This is our dinner, Kei! Stop talking about Kevin!" He almost shouted.

Keigo is startled at the sudden outburst. "What is wrong with you Ryo? Aren't you happy that Kevin is pregnant with our child?"

"_Your child._" He said it like he despise the world 'our child' in Keigo's comment.

Keigo narrowed his eyes at that. "Why are you so cranky this few days?" He asked annoyingly, while putting down his spoon and fork on the table. "Kevin is worried about you. You could have done better than stressing him while he is nearing his third semester."

Ryoma seeing red at that words. He laughed sarcastically, lucky that the two of them had chose a room to dinner with. Otherwise, people would mistake him as being crazy to laugh like that. "Me?! Stressing him?! HAHAHA! It is HIM who is stressing me! I wish he hadn't been pregnant the first place! Only a freak would get preg-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence when a hand come down on his cheek.

Ryoma stumble back from the force with his wide eyes. He slowly touched his red cheek and stare shocked at Keigo.

"Don't ever say that kind of thing about him!" He warned, body trembling with anger. "My mom is right about how you has changed. Until you decided to calm yourself, don't come home. I don't want Kevin to see you like this." Without another word, Keigo left him alone in the room.

Only five minutes standing there, Ryoma finally realize that he had made his jealousy known to Keigo. He cursed at his stupidity. Saying his own lover a freak just because he can't help that he wish to have the kind of specialty like Kevin had.

He do as Keigo's said. He calmed himself by drinking at the nearest bar. He only went home two hours later where his lovers already fall asleep. Not even bother to greet him back like they used to be. He wondered if Keigo had told them about their argument. He can guess he wouldn't tell Kevin because he is so in love with the blond boy and don't want to stress him. Bla bla bla.

His question was answered the next day when Seiichi and Sanada approached him the moment he step inside the mansion after he has done with his works. They bring him to the study room, far away from Kevin's ear, worried that their talk session would be heard.

"I heard you said some awful thing about Kevin." Seiichi had started first. He had this stare that show how angry he is with Ryoma while Sanada only expressed him with his disappointment on his face.

"Yeah." He admitted. Not in the mood for the talk. "If you just want to lecture me like Keigo did, don't waste your time because im so tired for this discussion." He try to walk to the door when a hand roughly set him back on the cushion.

"What the hell?!" He cursed while glaring at Seiichi.

"No. We talk now!" He pointed his hand at Ryoma. "I had tolerated you all this time. You have changed Ryoma! What is wrong with you?!"

He stand to face Seiichi. "Nothing is wrong with me, Sei! Nothing if that you want to hear!"

"Don't you dare lie to me! I can see it in your eyes! The way you look at Kevin nowadays, it's like you see him as an enemy!"

Kevin again. He had enough of people keep talking about Kevin to him. Enough of Kevin!

"So what if I see him as an enemy?! He get all the attention while you left me alone! You don't even realize that you always talk about him! It is always him!" He raised his voice.

"Ryoma." Sanada finally spoke, with a hint of warning.

"He is your lover, Ryoma! Lover!" Seiichi shouted back.

"Well, not now because I don't plan to have a freak as a lover!"

SLAP.

That was the second time he getting the slap in that week. This time he crashed on the floor because Sanada had decided to slap him with all his might that cause his mouth to tear a bit. Tears already threatening to fall on his cheek.

Seiichi also shocked by Sanada's action. The point of the two of them confront Ryoma is because if Seiichi ever lose control, Sanada could refrain him from doing much damage. But now it seem that Sanada is the first to snap and hit Ryoma.

Ryoma still himself on the floor. His shoulder is trembling from the sobbing. Slowly and ignoring his two lovers, he made his way to the door.

"Go calm yourself." He heard Sanada said the word with the cold tone he rarely use unless he is very angry.

Ryoma didn't waste any time and immediately left. He is angry, sad and hurt. He wish all of this never happen in the first place. On his way to the stair, he saw Kevin coming to his way with his big rounded belly and that stupid smile. He waves his hand at Ryoma. Not aware of the mood Ryoma was in.

Ryoma didn't care anymore because of this bad thing happened to him was because of Kevin. He walked faster and trying to ignore Kevin. But the blond boy notice something is wrong when Ryoma pushed him aside until he hit the wall.

"This is all your fault!" He screamed before running down the stair and away from the mansion.

Kevin was so in shock at the rough treatment. Only a second later, he felt a stabbing pain at his lower body and screamed. Seiichi and Sanada who are not far away, were shocked to hear it and they immediately made their way to find the source of scream.

Syuusuke and Tezuka had been at the library when they also notice it. Worry that something could have happened to Kevin.

When the two of them arrived, everything move in blurry motion. They are aware that Kevin is bleeding and already fainted. Blood everywhere. Someone is screaming to call the ambulance. Sanada already carry Kevin bridal style. Tezuka stood not know what to do.

Syuusuke already had his phone to call ambulance.

Everything is a wrecked. This is the final action that would bring the destruction to the relationship. It just that it isn't easy to begin with.


	2. Chapter 2

**I changed everything from this chapter. yeah. so sorry if it doesnt fit your taste and different from the old one. Happy reading and review. **

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**Chapter 2 : Breakdown**

Ryoma's hand is shaking badly because of the emotion he felt right now. Anger, sadness and guiltiness all are swirling inside his head. His eyes is unfocused and he just stared ahead of him without knowing where he wants to go.

It feels like he doesn't have any home anymore. No one needed him. His lovers already showed their disinterested toward him. And Kevin. He pushed Kevin, his pregnant lover. The tiny piece of his heart still have this gut to worry about the cause of his misery.

In this situation that Ryoma really missed his parent so much. He really wish they were still alive so that he still have a place to go home too. Now he really doesn't have anyone to support him. Alone in this misery and cruel life.

He doesn't know how much time has passed since he left the mansion. But for sure his phone has been buzzing ever since he left. Right now he doesn't have any heart to look and answering any call because he knew it must be his lovers, trying to nag or possibly kill him for what he had done to Kevin. He knew the impact that Kevin received from his push must have some complication to him. Either early labor or something else that Ryoma refuse to think.

After walking without any direction, Ryoma couldn't even remember that he already sit down on the grass. He looked around and notice that he is sitting under the big tree at the park where they always have their picnic. Another painful thing to remember.

He touched his cheek and realized he is still crying. He is really tired. He wished this is all a dream and when he wake up, all of the painful thing will disappear and everything return to normal.

**~the unspoken truth~**

_He is dreaming about his old life where his parent is still alive. He has just got home from practice and was about to greet his parent when he heard the two of them talking quietly in the background. Of course his parent always talking quietly with each but only when they doesn't want anyone to hear them. _

_Normally Ryoma would ignore them and respect the privacy but he didn't know why this time he is so curious to hear what his parent are talking about._

"…_..phrodite…"_

"…_not mature until he is ready."_

_Ryoma raised his eyebrow. What are they talking about? He quietly sneak and listen harder to hear the discussion. But to no avail he still can't catch up on what they are saying._

"_Let just hope he doesn't turn gay so that all of these won't show up." Nanjiroh laughed. _

_Okay._

_Ryoma didn't even understand what his parent were talking about so he huffed and went to his room. _

_The discussion that day forgotten that evening. Buried deep inside his mind._

He was rudely awake when a hand roughly tugged his collar and he is startled by the sudden intrusion. His mind is blur from the sleepiness. He felt hot and cold at the same time. Shivering uncontrollably.

His eyes is adjusting to the morning light and the first thing he sees is Syuusuke's blue eyes are glaring angrily at him. His lover seem to say something but he can't really hear and catch what his lover is saying. His mind is still processing thing.

Until a hand landed itself on his cheek and he thumped on the grass. Everything is spinning.

What is happening here?

"STOP IT, SYU!" Ryoma heard a familiar voice shouted.

His cheek is stinging like crazy and he taste copper in his mouth. Still not looking at what he assumed his lovers, two of them judging from their voices, he wipe his bleeding mouth. Yesterday night he got slapped hard and his mouth tear a bit but with second slap at the same cheek, this time it is bleeding much more.

He coughed and turned to glare at his lovers.

It was Tezuka and Syuusuke this time. The older boy is holding the brunette down. It seem that Syuusuke is trying hard to get at him, already knew the cause of his anger.

"Calm down! You promised to be calm when you see him!"

"You think I can calm down after what he had done to Kevin?!" Syuusuke retorted back. He is trying to break free from Tezuka's strong hold.

"Wait until we are back at mansion to discuss thing like an adult Syuusuke!"

Ryoma has been quietly watching his lovers. It is lucky that the place is a bit isolated to be seen. So right now no people has been spot in Ryoma's point of view.

"Ryoma!" Syuusuke barked.

Hearing that, Ryoma has to control himself from jumping in fear. Showing fear at this time would cause him to be trampled more. His hand is clutching his phone tightly.

"You think I will just let you go unscratched after you almost made Kevin lost our baby?!"

"Syu! Stop it!"

"NO! He will hear it! He will know that he almost killed Kevin and our baby!"

Kevin. Kevin. Kevin.

Ryoma really had enough and the next thing he lost control.

They hurt him. Each one of them hurt him. Three already slapped him hard on the cheek. Two hurt him with words.

Isn't that enough for him to lost control.

He screamed loud enough to drown Syuusuke and Tezuka's voices. He throw his cellphone right at Syuusuke and it hit Syuusuke hard at the forehead.

The brunette didn't flinched but was surprised by Ryoma sudden outburst. So does Tezuka because both of them stopped and are staring at Ryoma.

"I'M YOUR LOVER TOO!" Ryoma yelled. "I HAVE FEELING TOO! IM NOT A TOY TO BE ABUSED BY YOU!" He glare menacingly at them.

"I KNOW HE IS PREGNANT! HE CAN GIVE YOU CHILD! EVERYTHING THAT YOU EVER WANTED!"

He sucked a breath. His inside is hurting, burning with anger, pain and sadness.

Depress. He felt lost.

His heart cracked.

"IM A NOBODY! NOT SPECIAL! IS THAT GIVE A RIGHT FOR YOU TO HURT ME?!"

His hand grab something hard this time, and is about to throw it again at Syuusuke, because he HATE him so much right now but Tezuka is fast enough to hold him. His older lover hugged him hard.

"I HATE ALL OF YOU! HATE! YOU CAN DIE FOR ALL I CARE!"

Ryoma is trashing with all his might to break free from Tezuka's hug. He punched Tezuka's stomach and scratch at his face. While still screaming hurtful thing at them.

He felt suffocated and his head is spinning. Snot and tear were smeared on his face.

God.

He really want to follow his parent right now. At least he wont be hurt again.

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**Short. I know. New chapter will be posted next week. Adios~**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N : happy reading~ and sorry for my grammar.. POT is not mine.**

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**Chapter 3 : Hurt**

Hyperventilation.

He never experience it. Never wants it in the first place. And now he know how does it feel to be hyperventilated. To be suffocated by the pain your lover has caused.

It make him to be drifted in and out from his consciousness. He is still aware that Tezuka is still holding him tightly, two of them are sitting on the grass. His lover is currently caressing his back, trying to calm him down.

At some point, maybe one hour or so, because it feels so long, Ryoma finally calm down. Although he is still hiccupping from the sobbing. His eyes feel puffy from the crying.

He didnt move, knowing Tezuka would only tighten his hold on him if he ever made any move showing that he wants to be free from his lover. But Ryoma wriggled himself to be in a comfortable position and from the new position in Tezuka's hug, he can see that Syuusuke is standing a bit far from them.

Just thinking about the brunette, Ryoma anger came surfing in. His breathing become fast and he bit his lip in irritation when a hand suddenly close his eyes and turn his face to the side, away from the view of his other lover.

Ryoma groaned in irritation, slapped away Tezuka's hand and dejectingly leaning onto his chest. He ignore Syuusuke's presence. After he threw away his cellphone at Syuusuke, part of him felt satisfied with his brave self. Because never in his life he had thought of hurting the one he loves. He vowed to love them faithfully but he never get the same treatment. And he really think Syuusuke deserved the throw. He didn't care if the brunette got the bump on his forehead later. It was his problem to be cared by himself.

He coughed, his throat feel dry and hoarse after all the screaming. He is so tired. But right now, he can't let his guard down. Syuusuke and Tezuka may have been subdue by him because they never saw him losing control before. Maybe part of them knew they really has gone too far this time. But Ryoma wont take back what he has said. Because it was the feeling that he had locked inside of his heart for months and worth the tantrum to be shown to the one who caused it.

He take a deep breath. Just one question and this will be over.

"Is he.. okay?" Ryoma asked quietly. Because he isn't that cruel not to ask about Kevin's wellbeing. The baby is not in the wrong.

Tezuka didnt say anything for a minute, seemingly to think the suitable word to answer Ryoma's question.

"Kevin is okay. So does the baby." He answered simply.

"..."

_Oh…okay… _

He whispered to himself. Relieved washed over him. Now..

"I want end this…" He almost whispered when he said that, but very sure that Tezuka has heard it because the older boy get still and stiff for a moment before tightening his hug again.

When he knew Tezuka won't answer him, he continued, "I had enough.. There is no point in continuing our relationship when all you had done is hurting me."

Hearing that, the grip Tezuka had on his hand tighten.

That struck too much, Tezuka?

He snorted.

You just realised that?

"Let me go.."

"Please..!" Tezuka suddenly begged, making him look pathetic. "Please think again. We..! We can discuss this."

Yes. Tezuka is very out of his character. The stoic captain that he always respect now have the most pathetic face Ryoma has seen.

"Discuss?" He sneered, almost want to laugh himself out.

Had he gone crazy already?

Because when they want to discuss something with him, he always end up getting slap.

"And let you hurt me again?"

Tezuka really turned into stone from the second blow by Ryoma and Ryoma take this chance to break free from Tezuka, scooting away and make some distance from him.

"I can't even trust myself to calm down when all I want to do right now is slap and punch every one of you for what you have done to me." Ryoma spat.

Tezuka's mouth open and close like a fish, the word he wants to say can't come out.

"I know after this, nothing is easy for me because I still have to face Yukimura, Atobe and Sanada. But I won't back down from my choice."

Hearing Ryoma already changed the name, Tezuka gulped down because he is really serious this time. No second chance and no space to argue.

"I guess maybe Fuji already told those three. So I don't have to waste my time throwing another tantrum to explain myself." He stand up slowly.

Tezuka tried to reach for his hand, with his pleading eyes.

But Ryoma smacked away the attempt. Glaring angrily at Tezuka.

_Don't ever fucking touch me!_

The silent meaning behind the glare.

Ryoma quickly make his way away from Tezuka, ignoring Syuusuke all the time and walk away.

What happened after that is not his damn problem anymore!

He cut the strings with them. And stranger they will be.

~the unspoken truth~

His legs hurt and that makes him walk wobblingly. His hand is still shaking and right now he doesn't feel like he want to go back to the mansion. Not that he afraid to face either Yukimura, Sanada or Atobe, it's just that he wants some time alone to think about this.

His stomach has been aching since a while ago. Must be because he hasn't have any food in his stomach.

Ryoma looked around and realised that it was not far from his old house, where he used to be happy with his parent. He walked faster, feeling nostalgic and sad memory came surfing in, when the image of his parent, suddenly flooded his head.

After his parent died, no one attended the old house. His cousin married and went to America to be with his husband. It has been left alone and Ryoma hasn't come back to the house since his parent died. Mainly because it reminded him of many sad memories.

He arrived at the front door, panting exhaustedly. The door is locked of course but Ryoma has learned a long time ago to open the door without a key because his father always locked the door and forgot to open it when he went to the temple.

The door creak when he opened it, dust spreading around from years of no cleaning. He coughed a little and cover his nose.

He slowly made his way into the house, making sure to remember everything from the past. His mother's smiling face, his father's stupid grin and his cousin's happy laughter.

He chocked a sob that he himself didn't realised. His tears come flowing down.

Ryoma stopped and his slowly sit down.

What had he done wrong in his previous life that he deserve to be treated so cruelly in this life?

If he is special like Kevin, none of this would happen. If only he has the ability to carry a child, nothing would turn bad like this.

* * *

**A/N : Ok…my writer's block is back.. damn.. sorry that the ending is bad…next week is exam so I have no excuse for my bad idea for this chapter..just saying after exam the angsty scenes will come back..ciao~**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N : First, sorry for my long hiatus... Second, enjoy~**

* * *

**Chapter 4 **

Before he knew it, the day has turn from day to night. He hasn't move from his spot since he arrived at his old home. Just staring into space, thinking the way he should do after this.

None of his lovers has come to look for him. Maybe they didn't think that he would go for his old home. Considering Kevin is more important, of course they would put a hold in finding him. His value in their eyes are nothing more than just another lover to be kept.

Ryoma shifted uncomfortably. The throb under his belly button has calmed down. But the growling of hunger isn't going to cease since he hasn't have any food. His manager must have been worried about him since there is no call from Ryoma. Even when Ryoma is on holiday he would always message his manager about his wellbeing so that his manager wouldn't worry. But today so much has happened that he forgot to seek help from his one and only trusted person in the world that can keep him away from his lovers.

Maybe he should go see his manager.

~the unspoken truth~

It took him 30 minutes to walk to his manager's condominium from his old home. He stared weakly at the entrance. With his disheveled look, he is nothing like Echizen Ryoma on the magazine's front cover.

Luckily at night less people are walking in front of the condominium. Few people who walk passed him look weirdly at him while whispering words that Ryoma doesn't care.

He make his way to the condominium and was about to step on the stair that lead to the entrance when his hand is yanked away with force that he almost made contact with the hard concrete. But the hand that yanked his made quick movement to save him from the impact.

For a moment, his vision swayed from the sudden aggressive movement. Plus he hasn't have any food, so no sugar no food and he is kind of hypo.

The familiar smell of perfume assaulted his nose and he doesn't have to look up to see who is it to know who has gripped his hand so hard that it will leave bruise later. Without another warning another pair of hand grip his waist and raise him to the broad shoulder, securing him so that he wouldn't fall down and run away.

Really, they like to force thing on him and use violence to get what they want.

Ryoma screamed and cursed at the rough treatment from Sanada. He kicked and flailed all he can. Grabbed Sanada's hair and pulled it so hard that he can hear some painful noise from the older man and wouldn't give a damn about it. He doesn't care that people are staring at them. But he wouldn't lose. Not anymore.

Sanada went into the limousine and wrestling Ryoma so that the younger man sit on his lap and his hand are being held down by Sanada's left hand.

Atobe went inside next and he sit opposite from Ryoma and Sanada. His face is tight, probably because of the anger or shame from ruckus Ryoma has caused at the street or maybe from other things. After all Ryoma is the problem and nothing would make Atobe Keigo happy with Ryoma now.

"LET ME GO, BASTARD!" He barked, so loud that he can very sure people outside the limousine can perfectly hear.

He twisted his hands to free himself from Sanada and use his legs to support himself. Even if he know he would fail because he himself learn nothing will escape Sanada's grasp but not trying to win himself will only make he feel worse.

"We are fucking over! You let me go now, Sanada!" The second he let that name out, Sanada get stiff and at the same time his face get grabbed by Atobe's hand and is turned to face the almost demon face of Atobe, with his frown plastered at the moment.

"Shut. Up. Or else you wouldn't like what I will do to you." He said sternly with a hint of an almost erupted volcano on the way if Ryoma wouldn't listen to him.

Ryoma stared back, albeit more dangerous and also he didn't care if they hurt him again, because that is all they can do to him, to make him subdue, by inflicting pain whether physically or emotionally. He spit on Atobe's face, shocking both men in the limousine.

"F**k. You." He spoke loud and slow.

Atobe's eyebrow twitched.

Ryoma swear he can hear the volcano of anger erupted inside Atobe and the next thing he knew, because he already expecting it, he get the slap.

Sanada let his hand go to stop Atobe from adding another slap to Ryoma while shouting to calm the rage down from Atobe. Ryoma took this chance to kick Sanada at the stomach, uncared of the ruckus inside the limousine. Sanada got himself knock at the limousine door hard and Ryoma again took his gamble and chance.

He swings his leg and aim for Atobe's face, hoping he would at least crack the nose. His leg hit Atobe's left cheek, far from the nose but at least he can kick the stupid man's face.

Because of the ruckus, the driver who is worried about his masters stop at the side road with the intention to check on the people inside the limousine.

Ryoma took this chance and hurriedly open the door and stumbled outside to escape. He can feel the adrenaline rushing inside his body despite the lack of food to give him energy. He can hear Atobe and Sanada both shouting for him but only his stupid old self will stay to take the pain. He sprint away, block by block.

Away from the one who hurt him.

….

He is unaware that he is swaying, with his body trembling, now that adrenaline gone and no energy left. He doesn't know where he had run away too. Everything is too confusing and light is everywhere. With the blur of people passing by and this one time he bumped into a couple and get shouted at for being rude of not apologizing.

Why he need to apologies. He is not in the fault. Stupid couple.

Ryoma touch his freezing hand, feeling very cold and blinked away the black dots that dance in front of him, unaware himself that he slowly getting unstable on his feet.

"Wha…" For a second, everything is swaying and going down.

He can feel the pain from the impact of the fall.

Hear people shouted.

_911._

_Help._

Shut up. He is okay. Nothing is wrong with him.

He just need rest.

~the unspoken truth~

At some point, he is waking up with beeping noise in the background. His vision is blurry and all he can see is white and lots of wire. He blinks away his blurriness, already figuring out that he is in hospital. But which hospital….

"Whe..re?" he wheezed, barely heard. Who he even talk to , he doesn't know… but there are someone beside his bed. He cant make up who is it. A doctor maybe?

"Whe…*cough*…" He coughed loudly and continuously, forgetting to breath because he cant stop. That beeping become louder too, alerting the person beside his bed.

"Ryoma.!"

His former captain's face come into his line of vision. Tezuka… Worry evident on his face. Tezuka hold his hand tightly and Ryoma let him because right now he doesn't have energy to slap away that hand.

Ryoma inhales deeply. He should have known. They wouldn't let him go easily, after what he had done.

"Please don't push yourself." He said worriedly. "Doctor will come to check on you soon."

How ironic. He sound like he is really worry about Ryoma. False hope always hurt. Ryoma closes his eyes. Everything is still blurry and thinking about it make his head hurts.

He let go. Right now he just want to sleep because he feel tired.

"Sleep. I will still be here." He sound really worry and sincere but Ryoma wont believe in anything that came out of his ex lovers' mouth anymore.

…..

The next time he wakes up, he feel a pressure at his left arm, a bit painful. He groaned and diverted his attention to the source of his discomfort. Oh. No wonder it is hurt, they are taking his blood pressure.

He sighed tiredly, feeling uncomfortable with oxygen mask on his face. He looks around, it seem like Tezuka isn't at his bedside anymore.

That's good. He doesn't want to wake up feeling uncomfortable with that man beside his bed.

Right now, he needs to think a way to escape from here. He is very sure that this hospital belong to Atobe's and that doesn't sound good to him.

But with his condition right now, Ryoma knew he cant even walk to the door before someone notice his disappearance. His body ached and it feels really hurt to even breathing. What really has happened to him?

He looks outside the window. He can guessed that it must be evening from the orange coloured sky. How many days has gone since he unconscious? His manager must be looking for him.

Ryoma is too engrossed in his thought that he doesn't notice the door to his room opened and two people walk inside.

The first person that entered already noticed that Ryoma is already awake, "Ryoma?"

That startled him, and he whipped his head, albeit very forceful and his head throbbed in pain, to see that Tezuka and Sanada are standing there. He just got his peaceful mind and now these two coming are only making him feeling bad.

He ignored them, not saying anything back.

"…." Tezuka and Sanada steal a glance with each other. Although they didn't show it but they feel nervous. Sanada motioned for Tezuka to come to Ryoma, hoping that he will calm down when the older man come to his side.

Tezuka slowly made his way to the chair where he usually sit while waiting for Ryoma to wake up. He is actually fidgeting, showing how nervous he is. Sanada make his way to sit at the sofa far in the corner of the room while watching both of them.

"Are you feeling okay?" He started the conversations, not really hoping Ryoma will answer him.

He isn't a talkative person to begin with. He is a well composed person, able to hide his emotion behind his stoic personality. But right now, in front of this one person, who he wrongly treated, he feel like he doesn't know himself.

"You have been unconscious for 3 days. Doctor said you have a bad case of Pneumonia."

Ryoma still show no sign of interest. He suddenly feeling like being slammed by guilty for the thing that made Ryoma like this. Their fault.

"Hey.." He said slowly while trying to hold Ryoma's hand.

Unfortunately Ryoma reacted badly to the touch. He slapped away Tezuka's hand roughly while glaring, "Don't fucking touch me." The tone full of hatred and anger. What made him think he can touch Ryoma casually after what they had done him? They think they can get away with being nice to him.

Apologize won't be enough for the pain they had caused him.

Tezuka feel the pang of sadness washed over him. He retreated his hand.

Sanada already standing but still made no sign of coming over.

"Get out." He growled and apparently saying that word made his urge to cough suddenly come. He coughed violently, unable to stop himself. There is a hand rubbing his back but he push back the unwelcome hand, doesn't want the comfort.

"Leave!" He said between the wheezing. "Leave me alone."

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**Ill stop here because i am still thinking of my next move about Ryoma's outburst.. ciao~**


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